I may get criticism for this post, but I don't care.
A friend and I were having a text-versation today about how we would like to be housewives someday. Like, 1950's stay at home with the children until they are old enough to go to school and then get pedicures everyday after that. We realize women before fought hard for the rights we have today and of course, are thankful for that. However, we don't understand what's wrong with wanting to raise your children in your own home, volunteer in the community, work part-time, tend to the house, and have a real meal on the table when your husband or partner gets home at the end of the day. As far as I'm concerned, that sounds like a great life if your household income can handle it.
I would like to make it clear at this point that I am absolutely not saying women should not work outside of the home or even be the bread winners of the home.. that's not even the point here. My point is that if a there is a person in the home making more than adequate the income for their family to live comfortably, then why shouldn't the other person be allowed to be a homemaker?
Too much focus has been taken off family. Parents put their children in sports and other activities to keep them busy, social and most of all.. away from those bad kids who are a bad influence on their little lives. And this is great, activities do offer many benefits for a child's growth and development. But in the mess of it all, family time has been compromised. Family dinners have been replaced with fast food and frozen meals. Free-time between activities is filled with homework instead of creative play. Parents have no time to themselves between their jobs, feeding the kids, paying the bills, and driving all over the city to piano lessons, basketball practice, and hip-hop/contemporary movement dance class.
More importantly, in my opinion, what about time for a relationship with your significant other? The divorce rate is up 378% in the past however many years.. and for what reason? Studies have been done, and that's whatever.. This is how I see it: In the olden days, women relied on men to survive. You found a husband and that was your only true life goal. But I want to look a bit beyond that. The men and the women relied on one another.. The man made the money out in the workplace to support his home while the woman cleaned the house, made the meals, and tended to the children (the people to continue the family name.) They NEEDED each other, bottom line.. sorry but that's the way it was.
Now neither needs one another. Men and women work and live on their own for years before they get married. They spend years dating a person before deciding if they are a good fit for their life (another downfall I see, but that's a different blog.) Neither person needs the other to survive so what's the point in keeping them around once a flaw is found? Seriously, think about it. I know what some of you are thinking, "ohhh but love is what is important! Once you find someone who will love you forever none of the other issues will matter!"
Love is all fine and dandy, but the love stories that set up our generation's expectations of love are unrealistic or BASED ON LIFE DURING A TIME OF HOUSEWIVES. You know, freshly baked pies and chivalry.
Men are visual creatures (usually) while women tend to rely more on personality (usually) when it comes to finding a mate. SO, what if the wife stayed at home during the day.. maybe has a part-time job or volunteers or something... but at the end of the day had time to freshen up, put on an outfit she knew her husband would love, and cook him a real meal? What if he had time to rest by having the meal already there for him so neither had to worry about taking the time to make one after a long, most likely stressful day? Would more conversation happen? What if there was an agreement and understanding of the duties each person had rather than arguing over who would do the dishes and who would take the dog for a walk? Maybe there is too much compromise in the world of marriage today.
During this text-versation my friend made a good point: "100% equality doesn't work. Men are better at certain things. Women are better at others. That is not a bad thing." And I agree, equality in decisions for the household I believe is important. However when it comes to chores and money it just becomes an argument.
I'm unsure if I will ever be able to stay at home full-time once Nate gets up and running with everything and I'm not necessarily betting on it. But I'm sure, if given the opportunity to do so, I would stay home at least for a few years to raise the babies properly and then work part-time after that. And I am perfectly okay with that. Hell, he already orders at restaurants on my behalf.
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